On one windy day in Auckland Lui and his mum are visting the sky tower.Lui is in his Batman costume he is a very big fan of him.Well Lui s mum used the toilet lui went to the roof top.Lui son where are u?
Mum im up here AHHHH SON COME HERE!!! Once the mum got up to the roof top she saw lui on the edge NO LUI!!! Mum I can fly. No u cant said mum Batman and Spiderman arrived on a building spying on them.Mum said grab my hand and then lui tries and he falls and Spiderman heads to the bottom and makes a bungie web at the end.Batman glides over to the kid and catches him and they both fall into the bungie web.BATMAN ITS ACTUALLY YOU im a big fan of u can u sign my costume. Oh ok but dont do that again kid.Okay i wont thank you so much.Walt: write a narrative that is descriptive (paints a picture in the reader's mind)
Nice beginning to your story Josh! I would love to see you spend some more time working on your descriptions to be able to show your readers your story instead of tell it to them.
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